My Grandmother always gave the best advice. I remember her using the expression, "Kill 'em with kindness," a lot. Back then I thought she was talking about my enemies, but now that I'm older I realize she was talking about my relationships!
Cause nothing turns a dude off more than a nice girl.
There's even a book called, Why Men Love Bitches... for crying out loud.
There's even a book called, Why Men Love Bitches... for crying out loud.
(That's not an expression, I'm seriously crying out loud right now.)
I can't understand why guys don't like nice girls!!!
Why wouldn't you like a girl who is loyal, trustworthy, and sweet?
You could introduce her to your Mom, and your Mom would totally love her!
She'd give you lots of compliments on how great you look.
(Even though you look like a cross between Meatloaf the singer and Meatloaf the food?)
You could introduce her to your Mom, and your Mom would totally love her!
She'd give you lots of compliments on how great you look.
(Even though you look like a cross between Meatloaf the singer and Meatloaf the food?)
She will fake laugh at all your fart jokes and pretend to care about your fantasy football team!
She'll give you back rubs, foot rubs, and even clean your toilet!
She's be a great nurse you when you're sick... you can barf on her even! (If it makes you feel better!)
She would be happy to wipe your drool away while she's staring at you and watching you sleep!
She'd never ever cheat on you... but it's OK if you cheat on her!
(It's my fault, I should be prettier!)
She just wants to please you and make you happy! You can be as mean to her as you want.... She's cool like that!
(You're right, I could lose a few pounds!)
She likes you so much that maybe sometimes she fantasizes a twister will destroy your apartment so then you wouldn't have a place to live and you'd have to stay with her. Then you two could just BE together! Maybe you guys could adopt some baby puppies and bunnies or whatever, and then you and your baby animal family could just go live off the grid somewhere.
Why wouldn't you want a nice girl like that? WHY DAN, WHY?
Just kidding, just kidding, just kidding, totally kidding!!! Ha Ha!!!
Wouldn't it be funny if I was like that?
Wouldn't it be funny if I was like that?
I meant to say... I know this guy Dan who has a totally small wiener and is a big time dummy! Hey Dan, why don't you go buy me some shoes you, butt hole!
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| Cause I'm a bad bad bitch! |
Ummm..... So, do you like me now?
